Sorry For…

If I were to die today. I mean passing away, final breathes, sayonara and peace. What would I be sorry for?

I would be sorry for not be nicer to the people I love. For being critical of who they are and not being able to accept them for who they became. I would and do regret all the harsh word that have come from my mouth towards them. Its obvious how most anger is a mistake.

I would be sorry for bringing the person I love the most half way across the world and leaving her alone. I would be most sorry for that, for hurting her and breaking her heart, that would hurt me most of all. I would tell her I loved her and everything in life was worth it because of her. That the best moments in my life where just to be with with her as I fell asleep and as I woke up.

But after telling her that I think the pain itself will kill me

It never ceases to amaze me how cruel life can be, how hard it is and how it ends.

People talk about how endings matter the most, but the ones that we love leave us heart broken, but we love them still. So maybe not all endings matter.

I guess we don’t blame them for dying

Born to die

What else would I be sorry for?

Sorry for not making money ? Probably not?

Sorry for working in an office? I don’t think it matters so much. I honestly try to make things better each day. I really do. I might not always succeed or believe in it 100% but I really give it everything.

Maybe I need to believe more or do things I believe in more.

Sorry for not taking more chances? Yeah, some I would regret not taking. I mean I would regret not failing more.

Fail at something, I mean maybe you need to put yourself out there more. Fail miserably at something or die trying.

Gotta love 50

Its just that I don’t know what to fail at.

Fail at something I believe in perhaps?

But yeah, saying I love you, being more patient and taking more chances

That’s what it comes down to.